Let’s rip the Band-Aid off: Not all traditions are sacred. In fact, some are just outdated, awkward, or downright irrelevant for today’s couples. If your wedding planning feels more like checking off someone else’s to-do list than designing a day that’s authentic to you, you’re not alone.
As a wedding planner who’s knee-deep in the modern wedding scene, I’m watching an exciting shift happen. Couples are taking back the reins and unapologetically redefining what a wedding should look like.
So here’s my hot take (and yes, it might ruffle a few veils): There are traditions we seriously need to retire—and fast. Let’s talk about the biggest offenders.
1. The White Wedding Dress as the Only “Proper” Option
We’ve got brides rocking black velvet gowns, florals, jumpsuits, and even sequined minis—and guess what? They’re stunning.
The white dress was originally about “purity” (yep, still clutching our pearls in 2025?), but today’s couples are using their wardrobe to tell a story, set a vibe, or reflect their culture. Want a sage green silk gown or a two-piece power suit? Do it. Wedding attire should be a reflection, not a restriction.
2. Gendered Wedding Parties and “Bridesmaids Only” Culture
Let’s be real: Why are we still dividing people up by gender?
Your favorite humans are your favorite humans—regardless of how they identify. Mixed-gender wedding parties, or even ditching the term “bridal party” altogether, is becoming more common. We’re seeing best women, groomsmaids, person of honor, and party squads that actually represent who the couple is. Less gender rules, more meaningful roles.
3. Cake Cutting Ceremonies (Yes, I Said It.)
It’s 2025. We have donut walls, tiramisu towers, cake pop stations, and late-night cookie bars.
The cake-cutting moment? Often awkward, always over-photographed, and let’s be honest—no one wants to stop dancing for a slice of dry fondant. If cutting a cake together makes your heart sing, go for it. But if it doesn’t, skip it and serve up something unexpected. Your guests will remember the espresso martini bar way more.
4. Asking Guests to Choose a “Bride’s Side” or “Groom’s Side”
This isn’t a football game, it’s a union.
Asking guests to pick a side doesn’t reflect the blend of community that your marriage represents. More couples are opting for open seating or arranging their ceremony chairs in creative layouts (semi-circles, spiral aisles, you name it) to reflect inclusivity and togetherness from the first moment.
5. Honeymoon Fund Guilt-Tripping
Here’s a spicy one: You don’t owe anyone a physical gift registry anymore.
Cash funds, honeymoon registries, or contributions to a down payment? Totally appropriate and increasingly the norm. Let’s stop shaming couples for asking for what they actually need in a world where most people live together before marriage and already have blenders.
If someone wants to get you a gravy boat, they will. But don’t feel pressure to enable it.
Final Thoughts: Your Wedding, Your Rules
Weddings are rituals—but they’re also reflections of culture, and culture evolves.
In this industry, I champion personalization over tradition for tradition’s sake. I believe every couple deserves to feel seen, supported, and celebrated in a way that reflects who they are now, not who society said they should be fifty years ago.
So go ahead. Break the rules. Ditch the bouquet toss. Have a make-your-own terrarium bar. Wear blue. Get married in a forest. Walk down the aisle together. Or don’t walk at all.
Because the most revolutionary trend in weddings right now? Authenticity.